Whizzerville & Beyond

by Ronnie Ann Burt

There’s nothing like trying to plan a mini tour in the midst of one of the hottest Texas Augusts in many years.  Most places we tried to secure for an interesting place to take the Relics had enough sense to be closed for the month.  But we found two places that were not only open, but selling food that’s best eaten in front of the TV watching football in the fall, not in the shimmering heat of August.  But we said hallelujah and let them know we would be visiting.

Twenty hardy-souled Road Relics met up in the Best Buy parking lot in Bastrop on Saturday morning, August 19 where the temperature for the day reached 104.  Around 11:00 a string of some of the best looking antique vehicles left the parking lot and followed Paul and me down Hwy 20 to the intersection of Hwy 86 where we turned to head to Whizzerville Hall.  Whizzerville Hall is actually located in McMahon, a blip on the Texas map, but locally well known for the pizzas they serve.  The friendly folks at Whizzerville were waiting for us, got us served quickly (and accurately – always a plus), and directed us to the back room where we had the place to ourselves.  Once we had our fill of pizza, sandwiches, and/or calzones, and had the waitress take our picture, we got back into our vehicles and onto Hwy 813 to the Hwy 304 intersection.

About 20 miles up on 304 we stopped at the We Slaughter BBQ just south of Bastrop.  We Slaughter is housed in what was the original gas station in The Texas Chainsaw Massacre movie, hence the name We Slaughter.   Eww.  I don’t think any of the twenty of us had seen the movie, but you can’t live in Texas without having at least heard of it or having seen scenes from it.  Since we certainly didn’t want to eat again, we toured the tiny restaurant’s homage to all things Massacre.  They have all kinds of memorabilia devoted to that iconic movie, so we browsed and cooled off a bit.  I did see some Relics buying some merchandise, including my husband who has yet to show me what he bought, and Vic who just might be adding a bit of movie history to his train collection.
After that stop the heat was really getting to us all and it was time to say goodbye. Paul and I thank the Relics who came from various distances for first of all making the trip to Bastrop, and then sticking it out through the day’s heat.  At We Slaughter George asked me where we were going next.  I said, “Home!” and he sighed with relief and said, “Good!”  And with that, the Relics all drove home to sit in the comfort of their air-conditioned homes.  I heard later that some had dreams that night of buzzing chainsaws, but I think that was just a rumor.